Single on Valentine’s Day: Celebrating Your Girlfriends

It’s almost that day – Valentine’s, when we’re all ’supposed’ to be with a special someone who LOVES us. But sometimes that special someone isn’t across the table from us or who we are with isn’t the person we perhaps dreamed about. It’s okay girlfriends. We’ve got great girlfriend advice from a woman who’s here to help us celebrate the wonderful friends that fill our lives 365 days a year. Patty Brisben, founder of Pure Romance, shares insightful girlfriend advice for being single on Valentine’s Day by celebrating our girlfriends.

Being in the business of romance, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about and focusing on Valentine’s Day. Of all the V-Days I’ve celebrated, there is one Valentine’s Day I will never forget. It was the Valentine’s Day that made me decide to be present and active in this holiday.

Years ago, at the end of a busy workday, I had to go to Kroger to pick up things for dinner. Not realizing what day it was, I walk into Kroger and see hoards of men scrambling throughout the store. The shelves were empty and most of the carts were taken. Then it hit me: these men were hustling to find something for their wives, girlfriends, and significant others for Valentine’s Day. They were doing whatever they could to keep themselves out of hot water.

I took a step back and observed all this. Having just come out of a relationship I thought, “Please God, never let that be me. I don’t want to be with one of those men who’d just grab anything.” I know that sounds a little harsh, but when you’re in a relationship, it’s usually a decision between the couple whether they’re going to celebrate Valentine’s Day. If it is a mutual decision, I sure would hope that both parties put forth real effort. And if he or she doesn’t, it’s not a promising sign. Some planning and thought would be nice, and we all deserve that.

After witnessing a Kroger full of men shopping last-minute, I was thankful— thankful for the fact that I had so much love in my life from my girlfriends, my family, and myself. I finally felt OK to celebrate Valentine’s Day in my own way. I made a promise to myself to always honor love on Valentine’s Day (and beyond) and spend the day however I want. As long as I stay present and allow myself to feel the love of my friends and the love I have for myself, I will have a successful Valentine’s Day.

I’ve redefined what a “good” Valentine’s Day is. For me, it’s a nice dinner out with my friends, drinking some wine and cheating on our diets. It doesn’t even need to be a dinner out! Having my friends come over to my house and contributing their favorite dishes is a great way to honor one another. People put their heart in cooking; what better way to celebrate a day of love than over a home-cooked meal and endless hours of conversation? A “good” Valentine’s Day can also be a movie night or a night to myself.

I realize that Valentine’s Day can be challenging for single women. But we all have the choice to honor all the love in our lives that day. Refuse to take yourself for granted. Celebrate your girlfriends—celebrate yourself. Stand firm in who you are and be thankful for all the wonderful things you are. Make your V-Day a celebration of that, not just a commercial afterthought.

PATTY BRISBEN is the CEO and founder of Pure Romance, Inc., the nation’s fastest-growing in-home direct sales company specializing in relationship enhancement products and intimacy education. In 1983, motivated by a desire to spend more time with her family, Patty got involved with an in-home party business, empowering, educating, and entertaining women. She quickly founded her own business, Pure Romance, which is now going global by opening markets in South Africa and Australia. You can find her blog at http://pattybrisben.wordpress.com

Thanks Patty for this GREAT guest blog. What Patty is too humble to mention is that through her successful business, she has been able to help countless women with their sexual health and has specifically offered support and education for women dealing with cancer and the effects it has on their sexual health – a much needed resource for women who just want to feel healthy and happy again. She also launched the Patty Brisben Foundation. A wonderful organization that is working to enhance women’s sexual health and well-being through research and education.

By the way, we LOVE guest blogs here at Girlfriendology. Have a great girlfriend story to tell? Want to celebrate your fabulous female friends? SHARE! (And, we also have Girlfriend Gurus – check that out to be featured on Girlfriendology!)