What are you afraid of?

Spiders? Snakes? Speaking in front of crowds? Or does the fear extend into even into our dreams? What happens when we’re afraid to make a step even when we believe in our heart that it is the best thing in the world for us to do?

Recently I met a new BFF. I don’t throw that title around lightly. I just knew when we met that I loved her energy and wanted to hang out with her. I knew she would inspire me, challenge me and show me brand new ways to look at things. And, in the little time I’ve known her, she has.

LINDSAY MANFREDI describes herself as a writer, ghost blogger, and social media rock star. She founded Linzstar, Inc. in 2009 to help small and large companies create a more effective and profitable online presence. She invited me to her blog to explore the following blog she titled: “Meet my friend … her name is Fear.” She was gracious enough to share it with Girlfriendology and I hope it helps you look at fear and your dreams just a little differently. And I hope it introduces you to a new BFF, even if it is just being a fan of Lindsay’s in the blogosphere. We girlfriends, and BFFs, have to look out for each other and introduce our friends to each other!

Meet my friend … her name is fear, by Lindsay Manfredi

I don’t know if fear is necessarily brought up around me all the time, or if it is just something that I have become keen to in the past two weeks. Regardless, fear, talk of fear, people not doing things OUT of fear, have been surrounding me. First, I wonder why…then I wonder…where does that get us?

My dear friend, David Cain, believes most of us operate our lives out of fear. Perhaps fear is what drives some folks…makes them do the constructive things they do. On the flip side, I wonder how many lives are paralyzed because of fear. How many people DON’T do things, or reach their ultimate potential or goals because they’re afraid? And really, what are they afraid of? Failure? Success? Actually having to commit to something?

I remember when I did my first blog ever. I was reading other people’s blogs, loved the insights, loved the personalities of my favorites… (Locals- Kyle Lacy, Lorraine Ball, Doug Karr…Non-locals, Seth Godin and Chris Brogan…there are lots more, but this is where I STARTED.) Okay, so I am reading all these blogs…I have a crapload to say, I am fairly good at articulation (I think)…and I want to write. It was weeks before I actually did. Why? Freaking fear. Fear of wondering what someone like Kyle would think. Fear of what Indiana would think. Almost like, ‘what kind of authority do you have?’ kind of thinking. How lame is that? What did I do? I confronted it. I put it out there. The funny thing is, other bloggers out there, myself now included, ENCOURAGE you to get out there and use your voice. So the very people I was afraid of were and ARE the ones cheering me on.

This goes way deeper than my little “do I begin a blog or not?” dilemma. I was having breakfast with a good friend on Monday morning, and she was telling me about this phenomenal business idea that she has. The thing is, it’s just there, hanging out in her head for the past 11 years. It’s a business idea that could change people’s lives! I’m screaming to her “GET IT OUT!” Why? Well, if you think about it, action begins at point a. What is point a? Most likely making a couple of freaking phone calls. Point b, point c…the list goes on. Sure, there’s a big picture, but along the way to the big picture, are the small victories we accomplish in preparation for the ultimate goal.

My call to action: Dig deep for the meaning behind the fear, then confront it. Make the effing call. Find out what you need to do. (This goes for any area of life…relationships, jobs, sales, kids, beginning a company.) One of my favorite quotes is by Tim Ferriss-“Success can be measured in the number of uncomfortable conversations you’re willing to have.”

Begin that conversation with yourself…

As Ani Difranco so perfectly sings in her song, Swan Dive-”They can call me crazy if I think…all the chance that I need…is one in a million and they can call me brilliant…if I succeed…gravity is nothing to me…moving at the speed of sound…just gonna get my feet wet…until I drown.” -Jump in…life is way too short!

Lindsay

Lindsay, thanks so much for sharing this meaningful girlfriend advice. Spiders and snakes are nothing compared to jumping into a new business, leaving a steady job to pursue your passion or even voicing your dreams out loud to a friend. Be a BFF to your friends, encourage them to dream – and to jump in. And, show them by example, how great it feels to overcome your fears and run to the life you were meant to live!

p.s. Lindsay – I’m so glad to have met you! Check out her blog and if you need a ghost blog writer or a social media rock star, check her out! She can be your BFF too!

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For more great guest blogs on Girlfriendology:

• Girlfriend advice: Dispelling exercise myths
• Self-love guest blog by CHRISTINE ARYLO
• The gift of Sharing, by KATHY RAFF of the Friendship Stone

Tags: Blog, Chris Brogan, David Cain, Indiana, Kyle Lacy, Lindsay Manfredi, Seth Godin, Tim Ferriss

This entry was posted on Monday, August 24th, 2009 at 6:22 am and is filed under Be a Better Friend. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.