“I couldn’t believe how much I didn’t know,” a girlfriend recently told me. We were talking about the divorce she’d gone through three years ago. “Partly I just ignored all that financial stuff. I thought it was great that it was his responsibility–like putting out the garbage and fixing the leaky faucets. I didn’t want to worry about it. That sure turned out to be a mistake.”
When a financial relationship ends–through divorce, death, breakup, business dissolution–there are almost always surprises. Financial expert and Girlfriend Guru MIATA EDOGA shares important tips for getting through the stress of preparing to be on your own financially.
Whether you’ve filed for divorce or are sure it’s on the way, you need to be smart about your money. This is a difficult time to be “on your game.” Between all the emotion and the surge of activities that need to be completed, it’s not uncommon to give in to taking the easy, less painful path. Sadly, the “easy” path might be the one you regret down the road. Even though this is a painful period, you need to gather the strength to take control of your money.
I’ve been around far too many divorces that began as “friendly” and ended up as “screaming matches.” While you don’t need to be nasty, it is important to have your ducks in a row. Here are a few of the important things to remember along the way:
1) Collect your bank and debt statements. Especially if you weren’t the primary financial person in your relationship, you’ll need to come up to speed quickly. What are the bills? Where is your money going? How does the household financial picture look?
2) Make a spreadsheet. Your attorney is going to ask details about all of your debt and assets. List the account, payment, or contribution amount, total due (or total saved), and (maybe most importantly) whose name is on the account. Don’t forget about pensions, insurance, and non-cash or stock assets, such as vacation property or vehicles.
3) Consider freezing accounts. In some states, it’s possible for one spouse to raid accounts unless you have them frozen. Talk to your attorney and banker about whether you need to lock down your finances until the proceedings are finished. Brokerage companies and banks are happy to change your account status so that no transactions can occur without two signatures.
Finally, make sure you have good representation and protect yourself. Even in a “nice” divorce, you don’t want to find out too late that your representation was lacking.
MIATA EDOGA is the President and Founder of Abundance Bound, a 10-year old company committed to utilizing humor, inspiration & lots of love to give individuals around the world the necessary tools to thrive financially, while keeping focus on the things they treasure most. Visit the Abundance Bound Facebook Page for your free copy of Financial Success for the Creative Soul!
What tips would you give a girlfriend going through a major financial change?
By the way, we LOVE guest blogs here at Girlfriendology. Have a great girlfriend story to tell? Want to celebrate your fabulous female friends? SHARE! (And, we also have Girlfriend Gurus – check that out to be featured on Girlfriendology!) SIGN UP for our weekly newsletter and get our FREE eBook ‘30 Days / 30 Ways to Be a Better Friend‘ - check it out!
More to check out – Facebook.com/Girlfriendology and Twitter/@Girlfriendology where we’re connecting with over 50,000 women (we block guys!) and Pinterest.com/Girlfriendology where we share visual inspiration and great quotes. More Girlfriend Friendship Quotes. & Did you see our INFOGRAPHIC on ‘What Women Want‘?
Girlfriend Guru MIATA EDOGA Shares Financial Advice for Women
Don't you love having SMART girlfriends who give great advice? Well, we've got the go-to gal for financial advice for women. The President and Founder of Abundance Bound shares her insights in these guest blogs as a GIRLFRIEND GURU for Girlfriendology. (Thanks Miata!)
Rent or Buy? Home Decision Advice from Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend | Inspiration,...
Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need. Sarah Ban Breathnach I'm so grateful for my home. It's where I live, work, spend time with my friends (and pets!).
Saving Money: 5 Ways to Avoid Restaurants,Advice from Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend...
There are times when I love making dinner. There are times when going out is the joy of getting together with wonderful people and catching up over a meal. There are times when there are no ingredients in the house (unless you count tomorrow's yogurt and a packet of ice tea mix as "ingredients").
5 Tips To Save Money on Groceries,Advice from Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend | Inspi...
Supermarket automatic doors open for me; therefore, I am. - Craig Bruce My friend Shari loves grocery shopping. She loves the bright fresh fruits and veggies and finding new varieties to try. She loves discovering new flavors and ingredients and spices-and she is a gifted cook who takes her inspirations and turns out delish dishes.
What to Look For In a Financial Advisor, Financial Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend | ...
I admit it. I'm one of those people who likes to figure things out for myself. Over the last few (or maybe more than a few) years, I've worked hard to figure out where figuring things out for myself leads to positive self-esteem and where it just leads to stubbornness and frustration.
Pay Off Your 30 Year Mortgage in 15 Years | Financial Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend...
May the roof above us never fall in And may we good companions beneath it never fall out. ~Irish Blessing Bills are not fun. Paying bills is not fun. I can think of about a zillion things that are more fun than paying bills.
Financial Aid for College,FAFSA Advice from Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend | Inspira...
We dream of sending our children to college. When they are babies we dream of the academic/football/diving/debating/fill-in-the-blank scholarships they'll get. And then it turns out that they hate diving or love football but don't play at a level to earn a full ride.
Buying Your Next Car,Financial Advice from Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend | Inspirat...
It's that time again in my world. Time to think about acquiring a new vehicle. Ick. Sorry, that's all I can come up with. Ick. There are people who love car shopping-I am not one of them. It seems other people know so much more than I do about cars and financing.
Building Your Financial Plan | Financial Advice from Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Friend | Ins...
There are times when it's fun to drive without a destination, to wander the roads watching the scenery without worrying about anything more than enjoying the ride-hopefully with a great girlfriend along to spend time together. There are times when we need to get somewhere specific (possibly on time).
Are You Overpaying For Investments? Financial Advice from Guru Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better Fr...
We all approach decision making differently. Some of us race in, getting past the decision point as quickly as possible, leaving it to the facts to catch up when they are ready. Some of us agonize over every possibility, getting so caught in the "what-ifs" that we become paralyzed with indecision.
Going Through a Divorce? Three Money Tips,Financial Advice from Miata Edoga | The New Girlfriendology | Be a Better F...
"I couldn't believe how much I didn't know," a girlfriend recently told me. We were talking about the divorce she'd gone through three years ago. "Partly I just ignored all that financial stuff. I thought it was great that it was his responsibility-like putting out the garbage and fixing the leaky faucets.