I am Ashamed of Myself | Confession and Resolve from the Faux Diet Queen

weight loss fdqNone of us are perfect. And we all have days when we are less perfect than usual. Often we can ignore that in ourselves, but sometimes we have to stare reality in the face and ‘fess up to the things we’re not so proud of.

This week, the Faux Diet Queen stares into her (somewhat twisted) reality and shares some of what she sees in the mirror.

The Faux Diet Queen (or as we affectionately call her, FDQ) has agreed to share her latest (and last) weight loss journey with us as a regular feature at Girlfriendology. We hope you’ll join us to cheer her on, nudge her back on track when she strays, and generally giggle along.

I’m  ashamed of myself.

Not just because I ate all the pasta at dinner tonight before the kids could get seconds, although that probably wasn’t one of my shining moments. And not because I ate the last of the Oreos (again, not something I should really be bragging about). And not because I wrote in my food journal that I had three ounces of cheese when it was more like three pounds.

I’m not proud of any of those things. But they don’t make me feel ashamed.

Here’s what happened. A woman I know (she’s a friend, but not a BFF if you know what I mean), wrote on her Facebook wall: I’ve lost 10.5 lbs since January 4th and I’m inspired to lose more!!!!!

I didn’t cheer. I didn’t immediately “like” the post. In fact, my reaction was that I wanted to kick her right in all those extra exclamation points.

Why is it so hard for me to be thrilled and delighted that she’s having success? Why is it so easy for her to drop ten pounds in three weeks? I don’t really know the answer to either question, although I suspect the two are intertwined…

So,

I am going to try harder.

I am going to try harder to be happy for my friends rather than being sad for me.

I am going to try harder to say no to the chocolate (my wonderful, sweet chocolate) and yes to an extra serving of broccoli (which I like, but—let’s face it—broccoli and chocolate are not even distant cousins).

I am going to try harder to not beat myself up when I eat the extra broccoli—and the extra chocolate.

I am going to try harder to walk more than eight steps a day—even on days when I don’t really have to walk all that far.

And I am really, really, really going to try to lose more weight than my friend so that I don’t have to feel bad when I see the next set of exclamation points.

The Faux Diet Queen is a Girlfriend and a Half, trying to find her Skinny Self. When she is not recording her weight loss journey from the bottom of a bag of chocolate chips, she is constantly on the search for ways to improve the trip back to her smaller jeans. Her posts can be found here on Girlfriendology every Friday.

Girlfriendology / Debba here: We love our girlfriends no matter what size jeans they wear or what the scales tell them if they’re brave enough to get on them. (Something I personally avoid like the plague.) But, we also want our girlfriends to be around and healthy for a long time. We’re sharing this journey that our girlfriend, FDQ (the FAB Faux Diet Queen) because it’s what girlfriends do – we go through life and diets together (and shoe shopping, and highs and lows …). Join us on her journey to fitness and good health. We’re excited for her to motivate and inspire us all!

Here’s some more Faux Diet Queen ‘adventures’. Stop back next Friday for the next installment!

p.s. If your food stories fall into a more serious topic, like emotional eating, we’ve got a great girlfriend for you to meet too – ELLEN SHUMAN. She’s shared great advice on emotional eating on various guest blogs and podcasts. (Her podcast on emotional eating is our #1 listened to interview so lots of us have some emotional eating issues or friends/family who do.)

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